Friday, September 30, 2011

Where Do I Hide My Inspiration?




I'm sitting on the beaches of Kauai this week. Sand on my toes, and in my swimsuit :) waves washing over my feet and pulling the sand out from under me. Sunsets and sunrises I haven't taken the time to watch in years and all my friends (who know) certain I'll get inspired by the setting and write nonstop.

Hmm, frankly, writing still feels about the same as sitting on my couch at home.

Don't get me wrong it's gorgeous and I've written more here than I have in the last month at home. I just don't think inspiration works like that.
You can't go somewhere beautiful and ask it to inspire you. You may be inspired just as easily in a damp basement, as you would on a sunny beach.
My comfy bed at home has served my inspiration purposes quite well thus far, sitting cuddled in my blankets, laptop open, with a bowl of cauliflower at my side. It makes me smile and thinking about it sighs are almost involuntary.
So I was kind of worried when I told a friend that I was going to try and write while I was here and the first words you hear are "Ooo, I hope you'll be inspired!" Nice thoughts and good wishes, but not very realistic. (I really didn't tell that many people it's just that everyone said that or a variation thereof)
My story is not based in Hawaii, though I can't help imagining my little girls running around in the surf and hanging out in the local shops and towns, so, who knows maybe someday or some point there will be some tropical settings showing up in my books, but for now I'm sitting in front of palm trees towering above me at five times my height (I swear they're huge), ocean waves crashing against rocks that and unable to keep my husband off of them (yes, dear, I do think the waves will come up and sweep me off of them), and surrounded by flowers, and vegetation you can't find anywhere else, but when I turn on my computer I'm still writing about surviving dungeons, and trolls.
It's not any easier or harder than it is at home.

I still push through, but
here I have no responsibilities and no timelines.
So, it's been amazing but the real difference is no kids. Being a stay at home mom I never get a break from my work. It's not all hard back breaking labor, unless you count carrying a huge two year old around a Walmart Supercenter because he refuses to sit in the cart but if allowed to walk he will pull everything you pass off the shelves and into your cart. It's a long and never ending job. So, to find myself with this much time where I only have to enjoy myself, is a previously unrealized treasure!
Yes, I'm still excited to get home to my kids (I always know my vacation has been long enough when I actually start missing my kids), I haven't started on some newly island inspired book, but I'm trying to take advantage of every moment here to write and relax, and vowing to find ways to continue this process in my own home. That's got to be my new trick, finding un-disturbed writing time at home :) I'm just not sure how.
That causes only a little confusion, but with my newly vacation refreshed outlook on life I'm feeling up to the challenge!

1 comment:

Tamara Hart Heiner said...

LOL, yes, you're right, inspiration definitely doesn't work that way.

I suppose we all say that, "hope you'll be inspired" or be "inspired to write." But I don't know that we necessarily mean that the scenery will inspire you...at least, when I think about being inspired, I kind of equate it to being motivated. I hope I'll be inspired with new energy, new motivation, new desire to write.

Sometimes that requires a change of scenery. Sometimes a day out. Sometimes a few hours at a critique group. But as much as I love writing, there are times when I just don't have it. I don't want to. And those are moments when I think, "I need a change. I need an inspiration." Not necessarily a new idea...just something to get me going again.

Now that I've written a blog post in your comments, maybe I'll blog about this. :)